Dresses and Shawls

In continuation of my shawl and dress dilemma, I decided to stop off on the way home from work to a maternity outlet store. This store was really nice and big and had a huge selection of dresses! I was pleased that I actually had enough that looked decent and actually had to think about a few. I ended up unable to decide between two dresses, and since they weren't crazy expensive, I bought them both. That way I could show Mr Kiwi and get opinions, and take my time over thinking about them. I can also wear them a bunch of times and get good financial mileage out of them. Mr Kiwi prefers one over the other, so that will be the one I wear to the wedding, however I also have the bridal shower to go to where I could wear the other one. I am so NOT a dress person and usually go out of my way to get out of wearing one, but right now I am not so much a fan of pants. Or shorts. Or anything other than my underpants. So I may find myself in a comfy dress more than I'd have thought (Mr Kiwi was actually surprised to come home to find me with my pants still on since for the past few weeks, ripping them off is the first thing I do once getting in the door).
As if anyone really had to question, both dresses are predominantly purple. They are also highly patterned, so I don't feel I can used a variegated or bold yarn without it clashing with the dress. So because of the colors, I am down to the Misti Alpaca from two posts ago, as well as the Jojoland merino. I am still trying to decide if the Jojoland is too variegated. I might just stick with the Misti Alpaca since it it is solid and a safe bet. As for the pattern? I'm debating between the Icarus and Flower Basket shawls. Hmmm.

A Long Post... But with Pictures!

I took pictures of my most recent finished projects. Woo hoo!

First, we have the Double Wing Top that I recently completed. I have worn it twice since it came off the needles. The verdict? I'm still getting used to it. I like the way the pattern looks, however I wish the charts were written in the right order so I could have the lacy pattern at the bottom and the closed fabric on top, or all lacy pattern. I think it kinda looks a little off having the solid pattern on the bottom with the rest lacy. Since this is a more summery tank for me, I am pretty happy with the lacy-breezy feel, but it just means that I have to wear a small tank underneath. The only other thing I'm not too happy about it its length. This is my own fault however, since it is entirely the yarn I was using, but I also figure that it'll be one of the last shirts that still covers my stomach come July.
The yarn I used was Sweet Grass Wool Toe Jammies. It is a superwash wool and tencel yarn, which means that blocking is difficult. The yarn likes to soak up water and stretch as far as it can. For shawls, great! For tops, not so great. I was pre-warned (thank god) that if stretched, this will NOT spring back. So instead of proper blocking, I have used the dryer. It actually did a good job of what I would expect from blocking; more even stitches, nice fluff, soft..
You can also tell in some of the pictures where I wasn't actually doing math to figure out where to make my modification to string in the rope, but it's not too big of a deal to me. I am also VERY glad I did, since the "empire" shaping that the directions had me do were not enough and without the rope I look like a frumpy square. Thank you, insta-shaping!

Next is the Pinwheel Baby Blanket that I March 14 and finished March 22. It was knit on size US10 needles using Cascade Bollicine Maxi. The blanket went pretty quickly and was a nice brainless knit where I didn't really have to think too much about what I was doing. The only thing that was a tad bit irritating was having to start with the DPNs. Because I am not used to using them (hello, magic loop!) some of my stitches were wonky towards the center, however when I figured I had enough stitches, I moved up to the smallest circular needles I had. When the stitches got to crammed on those needles, I replaced the cable for a bigger one. THIS is where the Knit Picks Interchangable Set comes in quite handy. I decided instead of doing a plain knit cast off I would try to make a fancy edging. Also, because (as everyone knows) stockinette curls, and no amount of blocking is going to eliminate it completely. I decided to try a picot edging to see if that helped with the stitch's tension. It seems to have helped some, but of course not 100%. I'm still quite happy with it though. I also decided to start the bind off when I had a little over half a ball of yarn left, and good thing too! By the time I was finished, I had a whole 3 yards left. Whew! Yes, by the half way point I was sweating quite a bit.

And finally on the evening of March 22 I cast on for the Vine Lace Baby Hat. The only thing I remember about the yarn is that it is wool. This is a very easy pattern to memorize and knit, and I ended up finishing the next day, March 23. The only edit I made to this pattern was to add an extra panel or repeat since I wanted it to be a slightly larger size and since the yarn was smaller than gauge and I only have limited DPNs (see comment in the Pinwheel Blanket). It didn't make a difference to the decrease directions, with the exception of how many stitches I pulled the yarn through in the bind off; 10 instead of 9. I used a balloon to block the hat, which also doubled as a perfect model for pictures. I also decided to photograph the crown since I think the decreases are pretty cool looking.

Decisions, decisions...

I finished the Double Wing Top on March 11th (and still have to get Mr Kiwi to take pictures..) and set on to a new, fast project; the pinwheel baby blanket. I had 5 skeins of a nice worsted weight wool and acrylic blend, and am almost finished with the blanket too!

I'm already plotting out my next project, and I am sure most of us knitters have found ourselves in a similar situation... I have a wedding to attend the last weekend in May, and am told that it may get a little chilly at the evening reception. New project: shawl! The problem? I don't have my outfit picked out yet, so picking the appropriate shawl and color is proving to be a bit difficult. So far I think I've convinced myself to either knit the Icarus Shawl or add some repeats to the Swallow Tail Shawl. I have plenty of time if I start next week, right? Since my yarn budget is quite tight right now I am trying to knit from my stash. My options are:
one skein of Claudia Hand Painted in the Blue Fields colorway.
2 skeins of Misti Alpaca Lace

2 skeins of Jojoland Harmony in the hc09 colorway
or 4 skeins of Crystal Palace Kid Merino.

(and yes, I realize how lame it is that I only have 1/2 the pictures)

So I have purples, a blue/yellow/green, and a cream/brown/white. I know that her bride's maids are going to be in moss green dresses with pink flowers. Seeing as how this is the first wedding I'm attending since being of the age of being forced into the flower girl role (oh, the scars! The memories!!) I don't know if I should match their colors or if I should wear whatever I happen to show up in. And should I plan the shawl and get the dress based on the shawl, or should I get the dress with these color combos in mind and then plan the shawl? Or should I just give up on knitting a shawl altogether and try to find a dress that matches the Famous Boise Shawl? All this, keeping in mind that a "simple dress" is not so easy for me to find since I am on a limited budget, and am restricted to maternity stores.

Maybe I should cut to the chase and go dress shopping this weekend and then look at my shawl making options. Hmm...

Results!

Well this morning we had our appointment for the anatomy scan and to find out the sex. About an hour before we were planning on leaving there was a huge accident on the west end of the Bay Bridge closing 3 lanes and making the bridge even more congested and backed up than it usually is. The appointment was in San Francisco (UCSF Med Center) which meant we had to scurry to make it accross the Richmond and then GG Bridges as alternate (more expensive due to tolls) route. We ended up getting there at 9:45am when the appointment was at 10:30. Lucky for us, the u/s tech was ready and waiting (someone must have been unlucky enough to get stuck in the bridge mess) so we got in instantly.
Most of the pictures were for measurements, checking fluid, heart chambers, and all that fun stuff. It was weiiiird to see a picture of the face straight on and actually make out the eyes, nose and mouth. I'd say it was beautiful and moving, but honestly it was kind of scary in a creepy horror show kind of way. Since it was in the morning, I hadn't eaten more than a bowl of oats, and hadn't been moving a heck of a lot, someone was still napping in a nice little tightly curled ball. I was actually mostly expecting and preparing myself for a shy baby not giving up the goods. The majority of the people at work and in knitting who gave input on what they thought said boy, while only 4 total said girl. In order to get better glimpses of the baby, the tech had me roll on my side, or stretched the table out, or flipped me upside down. I think after laying flat the first time when the tech went to measure the femurs, he asked if I had been having much morning sickness. Luckily, I haven't. He replies with "Well, there goes that theory". Of course since it is a fuzzy black and while image of bouncing sound waves, it is not 100%, but it seems as though we have a little lady floating around in there.
Now we get to embark on the name game. We've decided that just in case, we'll also come up with a back up boy name, but for now it's focusing on narrowing down those girl names.

Non Knitting Post

So this coming Friday (as in the day after tomorrow) is the day we go in for the "Big Ultrasound". I figured I'd play a game with any and everyone who reads my blog and have people place bets or guesses as to what they think we'll find. I'd embed a poll in here, but I'm not computer savvy enough to figure out how. Plus, I have a very short attention span.

So! Comment with your guess! Not promising a prize for the winner(s), but I'll let everyone know once Friday is over. :o)

Picture Updates!

I've been promising post after post to actually put up some pictures of knitting that I have completed. Well, it seems like this is the post.

Here is the Simply Marilyn that I completed in November and never took pictures of.


It's started pilling some, but I half-assed took a sweater stone to it, and it looks a lot better already!
Here is the most recent FO; the Minimalist Cardigan.


This is a very comfortable Cardigan and since it doesn't close in the front, I can wear it for a while as my belly continues to expand.

I am currently working on the Double Wing Top from Expectant Little Knits, and I actually have details of the progress thus far!

Stitches West 2008

This weekend was amazing. And not may people can say it happened to be the same weekend their in-laws were in town.

It was a combination weekend of Jon's birthday and a gift in the form of an event that I gave my MIL for Christmas. Jon and I both took Friday off of work, but that didn't mean that we got to sleep in any. His parents came over at about 8am, and shortly thereafter his mom and I took off for Santa Clara. We had Stitches West, a knitting convention to go to, and we were taking classes! This was exciting for many reasons; it was the first of the three years I've gone that I have been able to take classes, I was going down for more than just one day, and I got to share it with someone who was really going to appreciate it as much as I do.

It was a trick finding parking, and decided to skip the line of traffic circling the convention center, which left us parking illegally in a lot across the street. We were one of at least 500 cars that had also already parked, so we felt safe that they wouldn't ticket and tow each one of us. We got onto the market floor, and of course it was fiber overload. We bounced from booth to booth, oohing and ahhing, touching, petting, and admiring every yarn we saw. For the most part, we had decided not to buy anything on Friday and that it would be better to wait for the sales when we came back on Sunday. Of course, there were a few exceptions to the rules. I ended up buying a skein of medium weight Socks That Rock in their Purple Rain colorway from Blue Moon Fiber Arts. Deb ended up getting a kit from White Lies Designs to make the Alyce Tee, and of course I want to steal the pattern from her once she is done. I had to replace a pattern for the Milinda Pullover that was taken from me, and of course picked up another one for the Leticia Cardigan. How could I resist? The final pattern purchase of the day was at the Stitch Diva Studios Booth for the Hourglass Jacket. Most of their patterns are so interesting and give the impression that they are a blast to make. It wasn't until I was home with the pattern that I check whether or not it was a knit or crochet pattern. While I learned crocheting first, I am a much better knitter and it would probably take me 100 times longer to finish a crocheted piece, if only for the time it took me to stop and look up how to do each stitch I was supposed to be using.

At about noon, we had lunch (read, Deb had a burger and I stupidly only had fries) before finding where we were supposed to go for our first class at 1:30pm: Stashology taught by Christine Bylsma. The premise of the class is that knitters are really good at acquiring yarn, making something (or not), and being left with little left over bits that fill our stash bins. She taught us how to effectively use up these remaining bits to make a tasteful sweater, top, pillow, or whatever. It was a really cool class, and without going into obnoxious details it really made us think differently about our yarns, how we use them, and what we can do with the remainders. The only thing I wish to unlearn from the class was how to do the "diva stitch". It was basically making fringe hang out from the middle of your work to make a yarn-boa, ugly fringey pillow cover, or...something else very.. unattractive. But aside from that, the class was wonderful and worth it.

We walked around the market a little more before deciding we were finished for the day and headed to the mall for dinner and some shopping before coming home. Remember that french fry lunch? Well, at this point I was really feeling it. I was so overstimulated that I was ignoring my stomach so my body got back at me by giving me an awful headache and an all over crappy feeling. We ate, and I felt better enough to get some clothes, which means cycling through more than just 5 outfits for me. Woo hoo! Diversity in things I can fit into! We got home at about 9:30pm, and stayed up until about 10:30 while we waited for the guys to get back from railfanning in Oroville. I couldn't take it anymore, so we both crashed.

On Saturday we all spent the day together at the Cartoon Museum, eating at home, and running some errands. I had to recover from my lack of nutrition the day before, so I napped for a few hours just before dinner.

Sunday was the earliest day of them all, since we had a class at 8:30am. We ended up making excellent time due to the lack of anyone else on the road, and got to the convention center at about 7:30am. We got some pastries and coffee/tea for breakfast before heading off to find the room for our class on Bead Knitting with Betsy Hershbergh. This promised to be a very interesting class, since I knew that there were a number of ways to embellish knit items with beads, but I didn't want to spend the time finding out and researching everything myself. It did end up being informative and we got to make a swatch with different methods of getting the beads in there. I think my biggest complaint with the class was the speed. I realize I am a fast knitter and have ADD, but it kind of bored me to finish the row we were supposed to be doing, along with the set up rows for the next sample, and have to wait 10 minutes before she suggested to the group that we get to the set up rows for the next sample. I kept getting ahead because I had nothing else to do, and would get frustrated when I actually had to stop and wait because I couldn't figure out on my own what we were supposed to do. I think at that time I was 20 minutes ahead. Deb and I took that time to plan our attack on the market floor with what we were going to buy that day. By the time the class was over, it was nice to get up and leave, however it was also a pretty educational class, so I can't complain about the pace too much. Sunday we were smarter than Friday, and after stopping only at Brooks Farm Yarn so we could each indulge, we instantly headed for lunch. This time I had a burger since it was bigger and had more substance than a thing of fries.

I quickly got distracted from my food and was looking at the surrounding booths planning what I would be attacking next. After much more wandering, debating, and wandering some more, I ended up with a pattern for this super cute kids' hat from KnitWhits, and Deb bought me some Superwash Merino Tencel in a color close to a light version of the Iris colorway (of course it's not written on the hank) so that I could start a maternity top that I have been drooling over. The pattern is the cover from Expectant Little Knits. After deciding that we had done enough damage and were sufficiently overloaded, we headed home to relax.

It was exhausting weekend, and I was not ready to get up this morning, but it was well worth it. :o)

Minimalist Blocking

That's it! The Minimalist Cardigan is off the needles, and blocking. Hooray! Hopefully tomorrow I can start seaming it up and have it completely ready for Stitches West! My very next post should include a bunch of pictures of the Minimalist blocking, being seamed, and being worn! I also owe pictures of the Simply Marylin that was finished eons ago but was never photographed.

Now the dilemma is: what to knit next? Mr Kiwi has hijacked my sock needles or I'd start a pair. I think someone should just buy me new Addi's and keep the ones he's harboring. ;o)
I'm thinking something small-ish, quick, and doesn't require a lot of brain power. A scarf it is! I love the feeling of accomplishment.

Finished baby Bear items

Yesterday morning I finished the baby gift that I was making for a friend's baby shower. It was the Teddy Bear Hood, Mittens, and Bootees pattern from Debbie Bliss' Kids' Knits for Heads, Hands, and Toes. I thought I would get a picture of the finished set (sans mittens.. I didn't have time) however when i tried using my camera, I found it stubbornly broken. What a weekend for Mr Kiwi to be in Tahoe skiing with his sister, thus taking his camera with him, huh? So to make this not another pictureless post, I found the image that was in the book. Hopefully in a month I can get a picture of a baby wearing the one I made ;o)



This was the only photo that was shown, which was good and bad. There were some parts in the pattern notes that were not exactly clear and because they are not visible in the photo, it was a little challenging to figure out exactly what I was supposed to be doing. A little trail and error, and I figured it out.
Knitting baby stuff is very quick and fun. It's almost instant gratification because they are so small and fast to make.

Knitting Change?

Last night a friend brought many baby knitting books for me to cruise through and knit baby items from. I took advantage of the great timing (and her generosity!!) and set to work finding a baby pattern... for a friend's baby shower that is taking place next Saturday. I had pretty short notice that this shower was happening, so I have to get on it pretty quickly! After consulting the other women I was with, we chose a pattern from the three options I gave everyone.
Since the shower is a little over a week away, I have to break my one project rule and get started on the gift! And honestly, I was looking forward to getting a bit of a break from the never ending moss stitch that my entire sweater is being made with. So tonight I sat down to begin knitting, and after the cast-on row, the instructions set me up for.. yep. 1x1 ribbing.
Ironic, huh?

Finally an Update

Okay, it has been waaay too long since I have updated this site. I have been feeling bad because my track record lately has been of pictureless posts, and I wanted to wait until I have actual pictures to post so that some color and pretty could be brought onto this page. However, it only resulted in no posts whatsoever, which makes for a much more boring blog.

So! When we last left our hero she was working on obtaining the very last ball of Debbie Bliss needed to finish the Simply Marilyn sweater that she was working on. (okay, enough of that) I finished the sweater Thanksgiving Day while at a family friend's house celebrating with a Turducken (it is really a heck of a lot tastier than it sounds... trust me on this one). Instantly after finishing, I picked up and worked on what little I had done of the Minimalist Cardigan. Even without working on any other projects in the meantime, I am still finding myself working on the cardigan. So much for monogamy making knitting one item go faster, huh? Well, I have a good excuse..

The weekend of Thanksgiving, we found out I'm expecting. Yep, my home of two is about to become a home of three. And that sounds very weird. With the low energy I have been experiencing, doing something as easy as knitting has become too much effort, when all I want to do is lay on the couch, sleep or eat everything in sight. Recently however, I have picked up the sweater again and am forcing myself to knit through it. I'm beginning to get some (some, most definitely not all) of my energy back and knitting has resumed. I am half way through the left front panel and only have the sleeves left to do. thank goodness they are 3/4 length. ;o)

While knitting on the Minimalist Cardigan, I decided to play around with the way I purl. I've never felt comfortable with purling, and have changed my method about 3 times already. I knit continental. I finally figured out a nice way to hold the yarn over my fingers as I knit and purl so that transitioning between the two is easier and smoother. This is essential as I'm doing Moss stitch and am alternating knits and purls with every stitch. I've noticed that with my stockinette my stitches have become much more even as well. Hooray! I've finally found a method that I am comfortable with!

There are still more "Me" things I want to knit before diving head on into baby knitting, so I haven't done any of that yet. I have however ordered Expectant Little Knits from Amazon, and am impatiently waiting for it to arrive. I figured since little baby items knit so quickly, I don't really have to start knitting them until June. By then, it will be so warm I won't want to be knitting anything big anyhow and a nice little baby hat/socks/whatever will be much more welcome and quick, perfectly suited for my lacking attention span. I'm due August 5th, but of course that should be taken with a grain of salt.

So that's what's been going on in this little Kiwi's life as of late! Happy knitting in 2008!

The Debbie Bliss yarn came in a lot sooner than I expected. I think on Monday the LYS owner let me know that it was in and I could pick it up. So yesterday on my way home from work, I decided to swing out to the shop and pick it up, along with some yarn for the one and only Christmas knitting I will be doing. I unfortunately made the wrong decision and took the longest most traffic filled way, when I thought that it would actually be fastest. I took the highway that EVERYONE takes when trying to get to San Francisco (or the airport), so it was nice and backed up... at 2pm. Then I had to go through a tunnel, which wouldn't have been so bad, but a car fire was blocking one of the lanes and backed it up for about a mile. Whew! But I made it and my happy little perfectly matching ball of yarn was waiting for me.

This was the first time I was in The Yarn Boutique in about 2 years, and they had moved locations since I had been in there. It's a nice little place, and looks like they have more space than at the old location, and each inch of the store is certainly taken advantage of for housing yarn, books, and notions.

When I got home, I was excited to start knitting my sweater again, without having to worry about running out of yarn. I seamed up the sides and was knitting some of the collar when I got too excited and pulled it over my head. When I walked to Mr Kiwi, he popped up out of his chair and was sure to tell me how great and cute the sweater is and how much he likes it. (I think he's gotten really good at putting up a show about my knitting ;o) ) Because of the super chunky yarn, it is pretty heavy to hold, but once it is on, it feels so soft and warm. The pattern makes the sweater slightly loose and not fitted at all, but it looks nice and is very comfortable. I think this sweater will be in competition with the Placed Cable Aran as my favorite go to sweater. I've also noticed how similar they to are to each other with the cables running up the front and back.

To all of the American readers: Happy Thanksgiving, and I hope everyone gets massive food induced comas all day and all weekend, and still manage to do lots of knitting!

Sweater Knitting

I had been working on the Simply Marilyn throughout the week, and brought it to Stitch n Bitch with me on Wednesday. Before I left, I realized that I might need one extra ball of yarn. I had just finished the sleeves, and needed to attach everything and knit the collar. About 30 minutes into SnB, I ran out of yarn. So close to finishing the sweater too! I have found an LYS that found one ball of not only the color I needed, but the same dye lot too! All I have to do is wait for it to come in, and then my sweater will be finished soon after. Hooray!

While I'm waiting on that, I figured I should do some more stash busting and knit something out of the yarn I already have. I have decided to knit the Minimalist Cardigan with Alpaca with a Twist that I got on some crazy sale while visiting Booth Bay Harbor. So far, it is going very well. Because I am using such small yarn, with all the ribbing and seed stitches, this will be a pretty long project compared to my track record. But it feels so nice, so I'm really going to be enjoying this one. The alpaca is also a smaller gauge than the yarn they require, so I am simply following the directions for a larger size in order to get the size I really want.

It's Back!

After Thursday's post of not enjoying the Mustard Parallelo, I decided enough was enough. It's unfortunate that I'm not going to finish that project, but on the bright side, I now have enough yarn to knit two much more enjoyable sweaters instead of the one. I might even have a ball or two left over from one (or both!) to make a hat or scarf from. All of these are much better situations than fighting with the darned pattern that will only make me think of how frustrating the knitting was each time I wear the sweater. Not something I want to think about each time I put on one of my own projects. Instead I will have two or more that will be more exciting to knit, and more fun to wear.

Friday after getting off of work, I sat myself down to try to find a new project to work on. I decided to walk away from GGH Bel Air and Soft Kid this time, and I'll focus on frogging later. My mother in law had sent me some yarn for my birthday that I haven't done anything with yet, so I figured it would be a good idea to use that up. Plus, since it is Debbie Bliss Cashmerino Superchunky, it will end up being a quick project.

..little did I know....

After a bit of searching, I found Simply Marilyn which called for the exact yarn I have, and in the exact quantity. Great! I cast on Friday evening, and now Sunday afternoon, I have finished the front and back, and am working on the sleeves. This is much more rewarding than the last sweater; it's going quickly, it's enjoyable, relaxing, and I am looking forward to when I get to wear it.

Perhaps I'll get some pictures up when Mr Kiwi is around and let's me use his camera.

Rebecca Magazine

Perhaps I got cocky. I plowed through my first two sweaters with absolutely no problems, and even modified as I went. I had too much faith in my knitting abilities. Now, I am one who rolls my eyes and mumbles "shut up!' when someone says "I am scared of [insert technique here] because it looks so haaardd and scary!" It's really annoying, and dammit, there is no reason to fear multiple circular needles, DPNs, cables, socks, etc. It's only knitting.

However, as I work on the Mustard Parallelo, with is pattern 32 from Rebecca Magazine Number 32, I find myself learning where UFO's and abandoned projects come from. These patterns have all been translated from German, and I have been having problems with it since I cast on. Nothing is described in a way that I can understand, and somethings simply don't make sense at all. Following suit with my last project (yeah, that lace scarf that no one really knows about), I feel like throwing this damn half finished sleeve in a corner and doing something else.

I know this can be a great sweater. A very comfortable sweater. But when I can't even figure out what the hell the pattern wants me to do, it makes me want to take the yarn out and make something completely different that does not come from a translated Rebecca magazine. They have very cute patterns, but dammit if I am ever going to try to knit one of them again.

Glute Rant

Okay, so what's the deal? I've been in level2 for a year and a half, and I still can't walk and squeeze my glutes at different timings. This is most basic move, the foundation of my dance, and I can't execute it. What the heck is wrong?! My butt's not working right!!

This is definitely a situation where my brain is many levels ahead of my body and it is so incredibly frustrating.

IK Winter 2007 mini review

Wow, I have not been posting as much as I used to! Why am I posting now? Well, it's turning into winter. When does winter officially start? How about when I get my Winter 2007 of Interweave Knits! I got my copy in the mail on Friday, and at least waited until I had to distract myself on the BART before cracking in and looking at everything. I must say that this time none of the patterns really jumped out at me screaming "Make me NOW!!" as some had in previous issues. And I actually found some of the articles were very good and drew me in more than the patterns (wait.. there are actual articles and not just pictures?! ;o) ). I found the alpaca information very interesting, and seeing as how I have only made two sweaters and was never told anything about sleeves, I was very interested in the Designer Secrets on Set-in Sleeves. There was a lot of good information that will definitely have me marking this page so that I can refer to it when playing with sweater patterns (which I am apparently apt to do).

Maybe it's me, and maybe I need to get myself up out of my never ending slump before I can really appreciate the patterns in this edition. Some look good, and I am impressed with the Ivy League Vest, however I have never done colorwork and I don't really wear vests. So while I can appreciate it, it's probably not something I will see myself making.

If any knitters really do subscribe or read my blog, leave me a comment and tell me what you thought of the issue. I am interested to know!

Dance Changes

I've been feeling a bit guilty about not going to my dance classes as much as I used to since July. (Does that sentence even make sense?) I decided that I would go to the one class that I have neglected since the instructors headed off on tours/expanding/self serchings. Dance movements, here I come! I was expecting Kit to be the instructor for this, but I was mistaken. It was someone who is a very experienced dancer, but not someone I recognized. The class size was pretty small; maybe 10 compared to the 20 that I had previously been used to.
The new instructor is most likely classically trained, which can be a good thing and a bad thing. More specifically, for others it may be a good thing, but for me, at age 24 with this being the first time I am trying to do any sort of jazz/ballet, it is most definitely a bad thing. The whole format of the class has changed. Where I am used to using this class to build my strength and balance, it has turned into a full on jazz and ballet class. Where I used to be able to do about 1/2 of the things with confidence and maybe 1/4 with the idea that I'm almost good enough, now I could only fumble through half of it. I flopped around in this class the way I did when I first started "the other" one, however now I have no desire to continue. I don't feel like I am getting enough time in my stretches, and that it doesn't tie in well with my goals. I don't want to learn a jazz choreography at the end of class, and I feel like the whole class is geared towards getting the students ready for the choreography. I want to build strength and balance, and if I am too busy trying to figure out what the hell the instructor just did, it's never going to happen. The classes are too expensive for me to fumble and be frustrated the whole time.
So now I get to decide what I want as my second class of the week. I can take 2 of the same bellydance classes a week, a fusion/cymbals class, or Kit's own gypsy dance class. Maybe I'll just sit in and watch some of those classes to see which I most like. I know I've been meaning to take the fusion/cymbals class for about a year. Maybe this is my change to get up and do so.

A Little Bit of Self Reflection

I've been doing a lot of finding out who I am lately. In my knitting, my dancing, and my general creativeness.

It's interesting, how I still feel like the same person creativity-wise as I was in highschool, however I feel like I was more whole as a 16 year old than I am now, as a 24 year old. Since then, I have gone to college and earned a bachelor's degree in two fields. I like them both, but that is more or less a different story. All the reader needs to know from this is that I am a "scientist". My job is to do research on complicated biology stuff than most people find "impressive", "interersting" or "challenging". People find out what I do for a living, and sudenly, that is what defines me. To them, above everything else, I am a nerdy scientist who wears goggles, a lab coat, and hides in a creepy place with my ethanol, DNA preps, cells, mice, and bunson burner. Second to this total geeked out image am I an artist to them. I am told "you think like a scientist", "you're analyzing", or "you think about things differently than artists do". Every time I hear these words, a part of me is beated down.
I view myself completely different. The exact opposite. To me above everything else, I am a sketch artist and painter who knits, and is trying to get a hang of this dancing thing. I am this creative person who is trying to support what I love doing by having a "real job" out in the big world. I still see myself as myself and my classmates saw me at 16; the weird, pierced theatre chick with big pants who was always drawing in the sketch pad in the middle of class.

Getting back in touch with old friends has somewhat woken me up. Every time I tell them what I am doing they seem stunned and shocked saying "Are you serious?! I never would have guessed you'd go into biology. I thought you were going to be an artist!" They find it hard to imagine me with a normal job, obeying a boss, and being restricted to "work" which does not lend itself well to creativity... unless you count goofing off at lunch coming up with experiments to see who can tell the difference between sugar-water and splenda-water "creative".

Earlier this week I brought my old sketch books into work to show a coworker. I hadn't looked through them since I was 19, but somehow managed to remember to cart them around with me where ever I moved to after college. It was strange. I remember exactly where I was when each picture was being drawn, when I drew it, and what I was thinking. They were all from 9 years ago. My coworker was impressed and didn't realize I had this side. It baffled me for a minute, thinking "But *everyone* KNOWS I can draw". But everyone doesn't. Nobody realizes I have these abilities, because I left everyone behind. I sold out on myself. I decided I didn't need to go to college for art because the one time I actually took an art class, I hated the instructor looking over my shoulder telling me that my picture needed more of this or that. (It's a story for another time, but my bratty teenaged self used my creativity and pictures to tell her to STFU.. which she did. and she never commented on my pictures after that) After taking that class, I decided that art instructors were stifling and limiting, killing my creativity, and dammit, I didn't need that; I was going to go to school to become a biologist.

I must have lost myself on my 18th birthday, because that is where it all changed. I stopped drawing. I stopped creating. I was stuck in books, homework, labs, and exams. And now? I feel lost. I feel like I abandoned myself somewhere between Florida and Pennsylvania, and I'm somewhat upset that it took me until THIS WEEK to realize that I'm lost. Where have I been for the past 6 years? And most importantly, how do I get myself back? How do I prove to everyone that I am more than a pipet and plasmids and really belong to my paper, pencils, and imagination?

That's the million dollar question.

Finding Myself

::looks around at my bare page::

Well, there certainly has been a lack of pictures going on here. And a lack of posting, especially compared to my old track record of almost every other day. As someone put it to me last week, I have a knitting hang over. I burnt myself out by pumping out the Gatsby Girl, Cashmere hat and scarf and 1/2 finished lace scarf, Placed Cables, baby sweater/hat combo (which I never mentioned here), and now another pullover (which I will mention shortly). All those since June. Less than 3 months of non-stop uber knitting. I need a break, and I've been taking it. I have been slowly chugging along on my Rebecca Mustard Parallelo. It also doesn't help much that I ahve to translate the German knitting language into English (American) knitting. Certainly makes it interesting! It's nice to slow down a little bit.

I also have not been dancing much since July. In part because of laziness, and in part because I was feeling overwealmed. It's hard to imagine that just over one year ago I was training my ass off drilling every day, and going to three classes a week so that I could be in shape enough to not collapse on the second day of my Level2 weeklong workshop. It became a kind of addiction. The endorphines were certainly pumping nostop, and kept me going even though I couldn't feel 8 of my toes for 1.5 weeks after the second day. This year's workshop is coming up towards the end of October. There is still a few spots left, I'm sure, but I have been doing the opposite of training. I have been slacking. Actually, I think that I am still at the same level I was when I walked out of the studio that Friday, dispite continuing to practice regularly since then. Maybe I'm not drilling hard enough or putting enough effort into it. Maybe my plataue is lasting longer than I thought; I almost had the interior squares layered on pas de bourres and chasses when the workshop ended. I still dan't do them.

I still feel like I am flailing around in class. While the other girls look like they are effortlessly dancing, I still feel like an awkward duck trying to figure out where the down beat is and which direction am I going again? Oh, and which foot are we on? I am definitely noticing the differences in the teaching styles that I have been exposed to. I have been studying Suhail Salimpour's format for almost exactly 2 years now. The workshop last year and the past 3 months are the only times I have studied dierctly under Suhaila herself, and the rest of the two years I have been taught by Kendra and Tiffany. All three have vastly different styles, and the longer I dance at the studio, the more I notice it. Since Suhaila has come back, I feel as though my Level2 class has turned into a Level2.5.

It's hard. Last week was rough and I came home asking myself what the heck I am doing and why the hell do I think I can be a belly dancer with no prior experience. Tonight's class was painful, but mostly in a good way. I felt like a flailing dancer (instead of a flailing duck), but I still felt like I was really dancing... or drilling and making it look somewhat good. I wasn't sharp; I was a bit wobbly, but it happens when your trying to do double time 3/4 interior hip circles on top of pas de bourres/ chasses/ a combo of both/ gapevines, or my favorite: doubletime singles walking doubletime. Perhaps this is what I need. To be beated down and struggling to keep up in order to actually make progress. If I can do it, it must be too easy and I must not be challenged enough. If I am struggling to make the movements and get it together, I know where I need to be and see the progress I can make; I see the next level that I must achieve.

I still think it will be at least another year before I allow myself to struggle through Level3, though. I can only imagine alternating undulations on top of hip squares ontop of singles ontop of some rediculous foot work. Layering like that comes way later.